Oct 20 2007
Loving partners follow each other, even on the road to heaven
We were discussing in our previous post: Is mom depressed?
Now what do you expect when your loving partner of 50 years dies of metastatic liver cancer?
When father died, I had a long stroll on the graveyard. It was amazing to see how old partners are buried next to each other with a date of death less than a few months.
In other words: if one goes to heaven, the partner joins within a few months…
Mom said repeatedly in the very first weeks after father’s dead:
I’d rather hang myself and be death as well…
That’s when my funny brother said:
don’t use the branch on the old oak tree,
it could break and
then you need to go to hospital…
Humor is one way of coping in a survival situation!
In Asian culture, we don’t marry the first year after somebody dies. Why? To give our emotions time to settle down and cope with the new situation.
All I want to add in the discussion Is mom depressed? is that:
- of course mom grieves and is sad
- mom already survived the first 6 months after father’s death and had a shoulder operation which left her without hands for 6 weeks.
Not bad for a person supposed to have a depression…
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